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San Francisco, Ca, United States
I'm on the left, Andrew is in the middle and my partner Ed is on the right. My partner and I met in October 1993 and have been together ever since. Our son Andrew graced us with his presence on Christmas Eve 2007.

My Day With The Birth Mom


Well, I picked up Birth mom at 830AM to take her to her OB appointment. She had been up all night at a hospital because she had developed some sort of an abscess on the roof of her mouth. When I drove up, she had no make up on and had her hair pulled back in a pony tail. She looked exhausted.
She gave me the whole story but said she did not want to cancel because she knows how important this appointment is.
We got to the hospital (general hospital because she is not covered by any insurance) and took a number. We were lucky to have #9. As we tried to find two seats that were together in the waiting area we heard "#6, #6, Seis, Seis". We looked at each other and said "oh goodie, we should not have to wait too long".
Once our number was called, you sit with one of the administrators and they take down all your information, then you go back to the waiting room and wait for a nurse to call you. The administrator we had, was not friendly. As a matter of fact, none of them except for one was friendly to the patients. As we were waiting for the nurse to call us (it had been probably an hour and a half already), I was standing near the counter. I was watching as most of the administrators were talking with each other and laughing while the one closest to me was talking on the phone in a very low voice as to hide that she was obviously on a personal phone call.
The gal on the phone said to me, "Could you take a seat!!!". I said "No, I've been sitting all day, I'll just stand here...but don't worry, I'm not listening to your personal phone call", and then just smiled at her.
Then about 15 minutes later (she is still on the phone) an elderly lady approached the counter and one of the administrators came over to her. The elderly woman seemed confused about a form and asked for help. She was extremely passive and timid. The administrator, rolled her eyes and said "I told you to wait for the doctor...Don't you know that?!!!!!
I could not help myself, I looked at her and said, "you know what I know? Your rude!...All of you here behind this counter except for one, are rude". The office became quiet and I looked back at the birth mom and she had her eyes open wide. Just at that point, a nurse stepped out of the double doors and called the birth-mother's name. I got our stuff and went inside with her. I told the doctors about the staff out there and she said, "I know, we get many complaints". It was just left at that.
The appointment was quite interesting which consisted of a physical and an ultra sound. I heard the heartbeat of little Emily which was sooooo cool. They then took us to get a sonogram so we could see the baby.....also VERY VERY COOL. The nurses and doctors were AWESOME and really made me feel apart of the whole process.

We finally got out of the hospital about 2:00pm. I took the birth-mom grocery shopping. We bought fresh veggies and fruit, soups, chicken...pretty much anything she wanted. She was very reluctant to pick things out and I had to stop her and say, "look, don't be shy with me, we have a history together and an expanding family, keep that in mind". She just smiled and continued on to pick out some food.
She was not up to clothes shopping because she was super tired. I took her home and helped her unpack the stuff.
I told her I will text her each morning to make sure she takes her prenatal vitamins.

We anticipate her due date to be December 10th. One day earlier than my partner's birthday. I have the sonogram picture and I look at it at least twice a day.

15 comments:

Apok said...

I bet you're so intimidating. Like a high school principal that one time when i got in trouble.

Doug @ Daddy's Tired said...

Nothing bothers me more than unnecessary attitude.

My favorite part of going to the appointments with my wafe was always listening to the heartbeat!

Happy Father's Day!

BellaDaddy said...

Good for you...I think I would have felt the same...and done the same...and CONGRATS again on the new little one...your obviously a caring person...and any child would be most fortunate to have you as parents!

Happy Fathers Day!

Daddy Files said...

Look at you puffing out your chest tough guy. I like it!

And congratulations on Emily. I must've looked at Will's ultrasound a million times. Granted, that was mostly because it was an amorphous blob, but still...

Otter Thomas said...

You are awesome! That needs to be said in about 90% of the doctor's offices I have ever been in.
Happy Father's Day!

Jason said...

oooh, that just ticks me off. It reminds me of when my wife's friend told someone that if they were that unhappy with their job she'd be more than happy to help them out of it. I was rolling in the aisles.

At least the appointment went well and the actual doctors treated you with some respect.

Happy Father's Day!

Unknown said...

It's called health CARE for pete's sake.

Now you'll have two December birthdays and Christmas...I wouldn't want to be your checkbook!

birthmothertalks said...

Isn't that going to be three birthdays in December? and Christmas too! Ouch someone is going to have to be buying lots of toys during the month of December. I can't wait till I hear about your first time of buying Emily a baby doll. :)

Andrew's Daddies said...

Dec celebrations:
my partner's sister's b'day
my partner's b'day
my brother's wife's b'day
Andrew's b'day
Emily's birthday
Christmas

UGGH..

NYCity Mama said...

Good for you! I hope that they remember the tough guy that spoke up to them and behave next time! So exciting to see the sonogram I bet! Happy Father's Day!

SurprisedMom said...

That is beyond great that you spoke up! I can't tell you how many times I've bit my tongue. Maybe next time I'll take inspiration from you!
December is going to be a busy month for you!
Thanks for sharing your doctor's visit with us! I can't wait to hear more about little Emily.

KWG said...

That's the way to step up, Daddy. Bad attitudes aren't conducive to baby check-ups.

Congratulations!

Anonymous said...

I just found your blog via your comment on Jesus Has Two Daddies. Congratulations! Your new little one coming, your young son growing so beautifully and your college graduate are all very fortunate to be part of your family! And I'm grateful that you're willing to share your experiences and inspire others! Best wishes! I will be haunting your site for baby pictures!
Marie
(not yet a Grandma but wish!)

Kimberly Wright said...

I think it is awesome you said something!

Congratulations too. This was my first time here.

Mom's Fortress of Solitude said...

As a mother to four special needs children, I have had many encounters with uncouth staff at various hospitals and clinics.

I have learned over the years to confront them and stand my ground, though. I have no reservations when it comes to advocating for my children or any other person who may be in the direct line of fire to someone's attitude.

I commend you on standing your ground, as well as defending a total stranger subjected to their rudeness.

This is my first time reading your blog, and I'm definitely following, now. I have no doubt that you both are wonderful parents, based on this post alone. Anyone who takes a complete stranger under their wing, and defends their character is certain to be an awesome parent.

Your son is just gorgeous! "Look out GQ, here I come!"

Congratulations on little Emily! You'll have to save all year to support all those birthdays in December. Mine's on the 30th. Can I be a part of your family? ;o)

We have three birthdays here, with only one day in between. My 14 year old's birthday is the 31st of January, and my twins were born on the 2nd of February.

I look forward to following your blog, and reading more of your adventures in parenting.

 

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